What Was In My Jukebox...

I haven't been driving to work lately, so I haven't been listening to as much music as I should--except for whatever comes up on my computer's Jukebox (Winamp with a bunch of MP3's). A Velvet Revolver song came up and I remembered that I was going to do a review on the bugger a while back... so:

WHAT WAS IN MY JUKEBOX

Velvet Revolver (2004)

We know the story...Guns 'N' Roses came out way back in the 80's and released Appetite for Destruction... one of the best rock albums EVER (See review in my March 2005 Archives). Sadly, they were a one-hit-album band due to lack of in-band chemistry (or too many chemicals altogether?) and released a few subpar albums before finally disbanding in the 90's. I have been waiting ever since first hearing that wah-wah solo of Sweet Child of Mine to hear another great Slash album--and since that was back in my junior high days, I've been waiting a long time.

Meanwhile, grunge happened. Stone Temple Pilots blipped upon the scene and pretty much were a ho-hum rip off of all the other garbage found in Seattle. They broke up too.

Fast forward to today and our favorite guitar-hero-desperately-seeking-project-other-than-a-Snake-Pit teams up with Ex-Guns 'N' Roses bassist, [ahem...] Duff, and Ex-Stone Temple Pilot crooner, Scott Weiland. Yay? We'll see... SuperGroup? Not yet...

Remember seeing the movie, Willow? It was a George Lucas movie, no doubt... It felt like Star Wars: it had swords, a wise cracking mercinary, a helmeted bad guy, little people, etc. But it wasn't Star Wars. Willow got me through the loooonnnngggg wait between Episodes VI and I, but really, it lacked so much of Star Wars' magic that we pretty much forgot about it. It was good, I guess. But damn it! We Wanted Star Wars!

Same thing goes here. Velvet Revolver is good. In fact, it rocks more than it sucks... but I couldn't help wanting to say, "Screw it," and throw in Appetite for Destruction. To make my frustration clearer, just try to get through Willow without grabbing your Star Wars DVD's once you get to the part with those stupid tiny hairy things who are supposed to be comic relief (see pic below). But I digress...



Slash does an outstanding job creating grooves that both rock and are able to survive on today's modern rock radio. The guitar riffing is real good here, but the solos are too short, lack "ooomph," and feel "added on" rather than feeling necessary (like the jaw dropping solos of Appetite). Slash does good work here, but nothing special. Hmmph.

Weiland, to his credit, doesn't ruin anything. He doesn't suck. He's like the backup quarterback who's asked to fill in not to lose the game--but not asked to be a hero. He's alright. BUT, he's no Axl Rose (pre-plastic surgery/manic depression Axl, mind you).

Overall, the songs are cute modern bits of rock that just seem overproduced and sterile when compared to the gritty masterpiece of Appetite... and that's my issue with Velvet Revolver. Sadly, it will always be compared to the masterpiece--and it will always fall well short. (See also: Episodes I and II).

Rating **** outta 8.