Okay, really quick rant here...
There's a new scary movie being advertised over and over and over again with some little kid whispering, "Who's afraid of the big bad wolf?" then whispering the movie info in some spooky scared kid tone.
STOP IT! We've already had our fill of spooky whispering kids:
"I'lllll neverrrrr telllllllllll."
"I see dead people...."
"What are Midichlorians, Master QuiGon?"
etc....
Whispering kids aren't scary. They are annoying and I want them off my television.
(Kids who write REDRUM in the mirror are a bit spooky, though.)
Thanks.
6.26.2006
Reality Sets In At 31.
I've always been a crotchety old man trapped in a young man's body: I walk to downtown Stillwater to see how high the river is, I keep bird feeders and change my feed in order to steal my neighbor's cardinals, I look out the window and shake an imaginary cane at the riff-raff passing by on their bikes. Music and TV were better back in the day, they don't make good stuff anymore, and I wish they'd just settle on a form of technology so we don't have to keep buying new DVD's and TV's.
(ahhh... the northern cardinal. add sunflower seeds to your mix to attract these lovely birds)
At the same time, I considered myself young: I could eat what I want and still fit into my 30x32 pants, the same size as in high school, I can play basketball with my young nephews every Wednesday and keep up, I can set the clock on the VCR when needed. I still rock out on my guitar every night and I can play the occasional videogame.
It's been a few months since my 31st birthday. I still fit into my 30x32's, but now the start of what looks to be a gut hangs over. Wha?
I weighed myself. I am now 154... that's 24 pounds heavier than my highschool-college weight! Apparently my body forgot how to lose weight by watching Saved By The Bell reruns.
Each time my wife cuts my hair, she has to ask what I want to do with my hairline. Once a month it creeps back, leaving stray hairs behind. I tell her to shave 'em off like the last time. Walking past a window downtown Stillwater, I noticed the sun glaring off my thinned out scalp and reflecting back at me, laughing, Ha Ha, baldy! Why don't you stop inside the antique shop? I know you want to! Damn sun.
It's official. I am old.
I now have to watch what I eat. To make it worse, I have to work off what I consume! Even worse: I went out and purchased running shoes and a pedometer! I now run a few miles every other day... and that's just to break even! I used to run in track back in the day, but now my muscles hurt a bit more than I remember and I don't remember sweating so much either. Sigh.
You know I went to see Deicide last time they came to the 'cities. I brought earplugs with me.
Sigh.
In reality, I think it's fun. I like to back up my old fogie attitude with a body that matches. I like to grunt and grab my back every time I get up from the lazy boy. I've earned it and I love it. My wife and I are going to grow reaaallly old together I and look forward to each surprise.
Did I mention my grey hair?
(ahhh... the northern cardinal. add sunflower seeds to your mix to attract these lovely birds)At the same time, I considered myself young: I could eat what I want and still fit into my 30x32 pants, the same size as in high school, I can play basketball with my young nephews every Wednesday and keep up, I can set the clock on the VCR when needed. I still rock out on my guitar every night and I can play the occasional videogame.
It's been a few months since my 31st birthday. I still fit into my 30x32's, but now the start of what looks to be a gut hangs over. Wha?
I weighed myself. I am now 154... that's 24 pounds heavier than my highschool-college weight! Apparently my body forgot how to lose weight by watching Saved By The Bell reruns.
Each time my wife cuts my hair, she has to ask what I want to do with my hairline. Once a month it creeps back, leaving stray hairs behind. I tell her to shave 'em off like the last time. Walking past a window downtown Stillwater, I noticed the sun glaring off my thinned out scalp and reflecting back at me, laughing, Ha Ha, baldy! Why don't you stop inside the antique shop? I know you want to! Damn sun.
It's official. I am old.
I now have to watch what I eat. To make it worse, I have to work off what I consume! Even worse: I went out and purchased running shoes and a pedometer! I now run a few miles every other day... and that's just to break even! I used to run in track back in the day, but now my muscles hurt a bit more than I remember and I don't remember sweating so much either. Sigh.
You know I went to see Deicide last time they came to the 'cities. I brought earplugs with me.
Sigh.
In reality, I think it's fun. I like to back up my old fogie attitude with a body that matches. I like to grunt and grab my back every time I get up from the lazy boy. I've earned it and I love it. My wife and I are going to grow reaaallly old together I and look forward to each surprise.
Did I mention my grey hair?
6.22.2006
There is hope in Minnesota.
It's sad to be a sports fan in Minnesota.
The Vikes? Who knows; and really, who really cares anymore?
The Wolves? Hah! McHale has run this jinxed franchise into the ground and The Franchise himself deserves to be let go to a competitor so he can get a ring. (Although I'd cry myself to sleep during basketball season).
The Wild? Uh... the Excel Center is neat.
Here's the spark plug, Minnesota!
!VAMANOS Francisco! !Estas mi jugador favorito! !Los Gemelos puede ser el equipo ultimo en el futuro!
Roger who? That old HGH freak had nothing on mi hombre, Francisco. After 8 innings, 7 K's and 2 earned runs, Liriano further cemented himself as my favorite Twinkie.
Now, add Liriano to Santana and the young bats behind 'em in Kubel, Mourneau and Mauer... LOOK OUT FUTURE, HERE COMES THE TWINS. Let's have one more World Series in the dome before we move outdoors, eh? October is mighty cold.
Oh yeah. Hey Torii. You have two I's. OPEN THEM AND USE THEM. The ball is LOW and OUTSIDE. Stop swinging.
My apologies to the Spanish speaking population... I am sorry for butchering your language. I am also sorry for assuming that Liriano speaks Spanish; I have no idea where he's from.
The Vikes? Who knows; and really, who really cares anymore?
The Wolves? Hah! McHale has run this jinxed franchise into the ground and The Franchise himself deserves to be let go to a competitor so he can get a ring. (Although I'd cry myself to sleep during basketball season).
The Wild? Uh... the Excel Center is neat.
Here's the spark plug, Minnesota!
!VAMANOS Francisco! !Estas mi jugador favorito! !Los Gemelos puede ser el equipo ultimo en el futuro!Roger who? That old HGH freak had nothing on mi hombre, Francisco. After 8 innings, 7 K's and 2 earned runs, Liriano further cemented himself as my favorite Twinkie.
Now, add Liriano to Santana and the young bats behind 'em in Kubel, Mourneau and Mauer... LOOK OUT FUTURE, HERE COMES THE TWINS. Let's have one more World Series in the dome before we move outdoors, eh? October is mighty cold.
Oh yeah. Hey Torii. You have two I's. OPEN THEM AND USE THEM. The ball is LOW and OUTSIDE. Stop swinging.
My apologies to the Spanish speaking population... I am sorry for butchering your language. I am also sorry for assuming that Liriano speaks Spanish; I have no idea where he's from.
6.20.2006
My philosophy papers...
In case you're interested, I am posting my philosophy essays on another site. I'll have one essay on the page at a time with links available to access other archived essays. The first one posted is my senior paper... it's a doozy!
Go here to see what my wife had to endure in her proofreading: http://www.myphilosophypapers.blogspot.com
Happy reading, philosophy nerds!
6.06.2006
Happy 6.6.6 Everybody
Whatever. If it weren't for metal, it would be just another day.
But I was born to rock baby! To prove it, check me out--full mullet--i
n my high school band (our playist: Angel of Death, Holy Wars (The Punishment Due), Seasons in the Abyss, Anarchy in the U.K., some random other stuff and an original song with a title I forget).
Mullets rock, Slayer rocks, Deicide rocks, the goat horn finger salute rocks. Let us celebrate all that old metal music on this day.
I am now going downstairs to rock out on my V-shaped guitar (tuned down to C), write an "evil" sounding song, and make a mix of all that good ol' fashioned metal.
Have a good one! Next year we'll celebrate Danzig on July 7th!
But I was born to rock baby! To prove it, check me out--full mullet--i
n my high school band (our playist: Angel of Death, Holy Wars (The Punishment Due), Seasons in the Abyss, Anarchy in the U.K., some random other stuff and an original song with a title I forget).Mullets rock, Slayer rocks, Deicide rocks, the goat horn finger salute rocks. Let us celebrate all that old metal music on this day.
I am now going downstairs to rock out on my V-shaped guitar (tuned down to C), write an "evil" sounding song, and make a mix of all that good ol' fashioned metal.
Have a good one! Next year we'll celebrate Danzig on July 7th!
6.03.2006
what was in my car.......
Peeping Tom (2006)
Man, I've been waiting a long time for this CD: six years to be exact. This is the rumored return to accessible pop music that Mike Patton fans have been dreaming about since Faith No More broke up. Yes, we had Mr. Bungle's California and a couple Tomahawk CD's to feature Patton's singing over structured, beginning-middle-end songwriting, but we wanted something a little more sane to rest our heads after ingesting Fantomas and Maldoror. These were fun to listen to, but throw us a friggen 4/4 rhythm every once in a while, eh?
Anyway, this is everything I wanted. It's groovy pop music with a good hiphop beat, but it also has the typical Patton edge to throw you for an occasional "what the hell was that?" and keep you guessing what's coming next. Every song features a guest DJ, musician, or vocalist (Dan the Automater, Dub Trio, and even Norah Jones make appearances) but this is 100% pure Patton. He does his (sorry) "Patton-ted" tricks: crooning, whispering, screaming, etc. while not seeming as obtrusively goofy as his other stuff (i.e.: he actually sings WORDS on this one).
With no throw-aways, this CD is a concise, concentrated collection of densely produced tracks. They all have their hooks in order: catchy choruses, buildups to payoffs, and sing-along melodies. It's challenging enough to keep the hard-core Patton fan interested, but it's accessible enough to try to slip in to the CD player when your friend is in the car. While I did appreciate his zillion projects between FNM and the present, I can finally say: THIS IS THE PATTON I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR! I WILL LISTEN TO IT AGAIN AND AGAIN!
Thanks, Mike!
Rating: ******** (outta 8)
Oh yeah, the packaging is really nifty. Not that it matters, but check it out if you are a downloader.
Man, I've been waiting a long time for this CD: six years to be exact. This is the rumored return to accessible pop music that Mike Patton fans have been dreaming about since Faith No More broke up. Yes, we had Mr. Bungle's California and a couple Tomahawk CD's to feature Patton's singing over structured, beginning-middle-end songwriting, but we wanted something a little more sane to rest our heads after ingesting Fantomas and Maldoror. These were fun to listen to, but throw us a friggen 4/4 rhythm every once in a while, eh?
Anyway, this is everything I wanted. It's groovy pop music with a good hiphop beat, but it also has the typical Patton edge to throw you for an occasional "what the hell was that?" and keep you guessing what's coming next. Every song features a guest DJ, musician, or vocalist (Dan the Automater, Dub Trio, and even Norah Jones make appearances) but this is 100% pure Patton. He does his (sorry) "Patton-ted" tricks: crooning, whispering, screaming, etc. while not seeming as obtrusively goofy as his other stuff (i.e.: he actually sings WORDS on this one).
With no throw-aways, this CD is a concise, concentrated collection of densely produced tracks. They all have their hooks in order: catchy choruses, buildups to payoffs, and sing-along melodies. It's challenging enough to keep the hard-core Patton fan interested, but it's accessible enough to try to slip in to the CD player when your friend is in the car. While I did appreciate his zillion projects between FNM and the present, I can finally say: THIS IS THE PATTON I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR! I WILL LISTEN TO IT AGAIN AND AGAIN!
Thanks, Mike!
Rating: ******** (outta 8)
Oh yeah, the packaging is really nifty. Not that it matters, but check it out if you are a downloader.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
